‘Eventually you will heal’, I whispered to myself as I gasped for more air, wiped all my tears off my face, turned off the lights and went back to sleep…But alas! I could not; I could not sleep! I was tired; tired of standing up to all the labels that society has set up for me to fit in; tired of making myself to live up to everybody’s expectation; trying to be the best daughter possible, trying to be the best student possible, trying to be the best to all my friends, best cousin; possibly trying to be the best version of myself to cater to the needs of others and sacrificing every bit of me in the long and exaggerated process of doing so!
Like many others I too was illusioned by the fact that we can be happy if we make others happy and if we leave no stones unturned in living up to other’s expectations…But is it true?
Does our purpose of life lie in the fact that we live up to other’s expectations leaving behind our happiness?
No, certainly not.
Be it your dream job or the reason that brings you happiness should be yours and yours alone and not necessarily of anybody else!
But as we build up the courage to finally follow our dreams to be happy from within; we are either discouraged or warned that if something bad happens then the responsibility would be completely ours or forced to move in the direction that would supposedly be good for us!
Parents must realize how difficult it’s for us to keep aside our passion to fulfill their dreams.
I know, no parent in this whole wide world wants anything bad for their child; but they should be little considerate in understanding things from the child perspective too and make an effort to make their wards understand what’s right and what is wrong in life.
Parents usually think that by providing their wards with all sorts of material goods, choosing the best possible career for them and keeping it all planned for them is the best thing they can do…Wise enough!
Children should be grateful for their parents for they have arranged everything for them. But in the process of making these things happen; they forget that one vital thing that matters – Emotions!
As a child passes through the different stages from being a toddler to an adolescent and finally to an adult, one thing that he/ she keeps urging of is ‘Emotional Security’ and that at least there would be someone standing by them- who would listen to them without judgment and more crucially understand them and not fire upon them!
Strangely enough, all this takes 2 minutes from the entire day of 24 hours!
Moreover, by just saying the magical words that ‘I AM THERE’ can do wonders in boosting a child’s confidence as much can one ever imagine!
But woefully, the society we live in; emotional security is given the least possible importance and talking about mental health is considered to be a taboo too.
Plus, be it children or adults who come up to talk freely about these are seen through the eyes of sympathy. They are forcibly made to believe that they don’t fit into the labels of that supposed society, that has been created from each one of us!
And it is equally important for peers to understand that if you want to have a true friend in life you got to be one first. Friendship isn’t a barter system where you exchange notes for favors or give treats for all the gifts you got for your birthday; rather it’s the most beautiful bond one can ever experience next to god!
It’s about being purely selfless and honest with each other, it’s about thinking about pushing each other up in reaching goals and beautifying each other’s life by being there; just by being there and having someone for a lifetime and knowing that it’s your safest place to lock your secrets, your go-to person for all your problems and being that one person who would listen to the other without any prior judgment or considerations.
So, To every girl out there like me who is reading this, I just want to tell that YOU ARE THE BEST just by being the way you are and by being considerate to other’s emotions and having empathy to the ones in need.
But in the process of satisfying all others and catering to each of their needs; never make it a habit to drain yourself and most importantly and in real sense know what is right and what’s wrong for you and never get swayed away by emotions!
There will be thousands of times when people will not believe in you, will even discourage you; but each time this happens its got to be YOU who need to believe in yourself.
There will be times when you would be stopped and warned not to chase your dreams, but each time this happens it’s YOU that’s got to be the one to think- if your dreams are worthy enough to be chased after or not and whether or not you are passionate about it!
And talking about the peer pressure that we go through silently in our entire childhood; I just want to say this that’s OKAY! Sooner or later you will find your true friends who will eventually stick with you through thick and thin.
All you got to do is be a good friend and wait for the good ones to pour in!
And have this belief that no matter what hindrances shackle you, YOU will rise above it! I know it’s going to be hard because I am still struggling hard to break all shackles so that I get a chance to chase my dreams but somewhere within me I have this belief that one day I will!
Lastly, sending all loads of positivity and much love.
And trust me I WILL BE THERE!